bring it on, real world

it is a strange thing to begin to feel like a "grown up," to start the process everyone calls "moving on," and to look at your college room and think, "this will all be in boxes in five months." i have struggled and struggled and struggled with the future, feeling that in graduating college, my life is completely over and at the same time just beginning. i think these are all normal feelings.

lately, i have been learning to trust. i have been learning that the uncertainty surrounding the exact details of my life come september pales in comparison to the certainty of Jesus. i have been learning (once again) that the Lord intends to keep His promises and that He will provide for the things that He has called us to, even though i am just about to begin on this journey of provision. i am learning that it is my joy to do what He asks. i mean, how much better can it get than to do work for the God of the universe? i am beginning to see that Jesus really does call us to lay down everything for Him, and i often wonder if i am truly capable of doing that.

i ask Jesus a lot, "do i have what it takes?" i say to Him, "maybe You should just choose someone else, someone who is more consistent, more spiritual. You know, someone who has it together." and then i remember God doesn't make His choices this way. His work is not determined by application, by resume or by grade point average. it is instead a product of His love and His grace.

i feel blessed to be called by name by Jesus, honored to be part of His family, and excited to begin the journey of doing His work.

two good reads

since it is winter break, i am finally catching up on all the blogs i read regularly but put off during the weeks of final exams and christmas preparations. i read two posts on a blog that i really like to read - called parchment & pen - because it makes me think but isn't so much that i can't understand.

the first is about restoration - "the gift of resoration."

the second is about ministering in our weaknesses and letting others see our messes - "cracked." (this is what i want my life and my ministry to be like.)

so good!

who is christmas for?

in my scanning of blogs today, i read a good article by matt redmond.

"Christmas--the great story of the incarnation of the Rescuer--is for everyone, especially those who need a rescue. Jesus was born as a baby to know the pain and sympathize with our weaknesses. Jesus was made to be like us so that in His resurrection we can be made like Him; free from the fear of death and the pain of loss. Jesus' first recorded worshipers were not of the beautiful class. They were poor, ugly shepherds, beat down by life and labor. They had been looked down on over many a nose...

Christmas is really about the gospel of grace for sinners. Because of all that Christ has done on the cross, the manger becomes the most hopeful place in a universe darkened with hopelessness. In the irony of all ironies, Christmas is for those who will find it the hardest to enjoy. It really is for those who hate it the most."

you can read the rest here.

never had to have a chaperone, no sir

my to-do list for today:

(a) work on the newspaper's mammoth crossword puzzle
(b) play in the snow
(c) read as much as i want
(d) spend time alone with Jesus
(e) bake cookies
(f) play just dance on the wii with emily and will
(g) fill out my camp application
(h) maybe start a family puzzle

i think it's official. i love winter break.

micah 5.2-5

but you, bethlehem ephrathah, though you are small among the clans of judah, out of you will come for Me One who will be ruler over israel, whose origins are from of old, from ancient times.

therefore israel will be abandoned until the time when she who is in labor gives birth and the rest of His brothers return to join the israelites.

He will stand and shepherd His flock in the strength of the Lord, in the majesty of the name of the Lord His God. and they will live securely, for then His greatness will reach the ends of the earth.

and this One will be our peace.

lovely things about today

(1) lauren & bobby are married!
(2) a beautiful Christ-centered ceremony, encouraging reception conversation, and lots of dancing.
(3) a cute dress & roommate time.
(4) decorating the tree with the family.
(5) watching white christmas with emily! exceptional.
(6) on my way to south carolina tomorrow: excited for friends & fellowship & oysters.

better

dear Jesus,

You are better than taylor swift, owning a lot of sparkly things, and feeling like i could have helped every girl in america get through a breakup if only i played guitar well.

You are better than glee, performing, and the showbiz career that i think i might've been able to have had i taken singing lessons young and moved to l.a. at fourteen.

You are better than gossip girl, having everyone talk about me constantly, and thinking i could've worn supremely fashionable clothes to overwhelming trendy events if only i were born rich on the upper east side. (and yes, You are better than blair's headbands.)

You are better than harry potter, being constantly placed in dangerous situations with my best friends, and possessing an intense amount of magic, courage, and love to save everything that is important.

sometimes i don't act like You are more important.
but i wanted to make sure You know that You are.

sincerely, laura

ps. by better, i mean much much much infinitely better.

interesting fact #2

i should be writing a french paper, but i don't want to right now. but i will post something frenchy on my blog.

i love dictionaries. i used to just read them in elementary school. i read them (a) because i really, genuinely liked reading the dictionary, and (b) when it was the right time of year, because i wanted to learn to spell as many words as possible in order to secure a win at the school spelling bee.

since i've grown older, i stopped reading the dictionary as much, since (a) i didn't have time amidst all the other schoolwork and friends and extracurriculars, and (b) it seemed like a pretty lame hobby for a high school or college student to have.

but then, a wonderful thing happened, and i stumbled upon a great new dictionary. a french dictionary for that matter, which is much more exciting because i don't know nearly as many words... so it is more adventurous! this is a french-french dictionary, so the definitions are in french too. and there are pictures! and diagrams! and a dictionary of important people, places, and things! it's le petit larousse illustre, and it's great.

i'm pretty busy, but sometimes i get to read it just for fun.

needing reminding, sometimes

i'm so forgetful
but You always remind me
You're the only one who brings me peace

so i come, Lord, i come

to tell You i love You
to tell You i need You
to tell You there's no better place for me than in Your arms

to tell You i'm sorry
for running in circles
for placing my focus on the waves, not on Your face

You're the only one who brings me peace
in the storm

-united pursuit band